Do you think you have pantophobia?

I don’t think I have pantophobia. But I do think of I have some other sort of phobia that I will need Lucy to diagnose and give me some medication for. It is the fear (or maybe more appropriately, the sheer inability) to make decisions.

Ever since crossing the line of The Marathon on November 12th (okay, maybe like 24 hours after crossing that line–after I’d had time to giggle a bit, admire my medal and sleep), I’ve been wondering whether or not I am capable of and/or want to run a Spring marathon.

As soon as I realized that I had entry to the ING NYC Marathon for 2012, I thought “that’s it, and that’s perfect.” One full year after finishing my first marathon seemed like the ideal time to run my second.

But you know us runners. Once we hit a goal distance, anything under it is rarely enough to keep us feeling challenged and satisfied. I thought signing up for this half marathon on Saturday would be a pleasant solution to my itch to want to keep on running. I’d relax a little bit after The Marathon and train through the winter to improve my half marathon time, and then maybe even just chill until training picked up for the ING NYC marathon.


Fat chance of that.

I took one full day off after finishing my first 26.2 (exquisitely spent at a winery in Charlottesville, VA with my family). My first day back in New York City, I was at the gym, trying to loosen up my legs on the old elliptical.

None of my workouts or runs or anything have been incredibly harrowing since the marathon, but they have been often. And plenty enough.

To the point where, a few weeks ago, I started holding up my half marathon training plan to my full marathon training plan and seeing how they may measure up. Turned out, the National Half would have worked out pretty well in the full plan, and could even have me in shape to run a late May/early June race.

Then this weekend, I went a little crazy. And I tackled 18 miles for no particular reason other than I felt like it. And I missed marathon training and I missed that awesome runners high (this is the sad, sad, problem with us runners. once you get the runners high from an 18 or 20 or 26.2 mile run, its hard to get the same buzz off 10 or 12 or 14 miles. I think running has helped me better understand addicts…). And so I ran 18 miles. Then last night whipped out the ol’ Hal Higdon marathon book and discovered that matching THAT up against a training plan meant I could technicallyyyy run another 26.2 by the first week in May. Early May!

There are a lot of different points pulling at my decision. Is it healthy to run multiple marathons per year? Will my body take a toll a few years down the road? Maybe I should try to find something I like other than running? Should I need to though, if I love running as much as I do? Can I afford the registration and travel, depending on where the race is (note: the answer to this one is pretty much a known “no”, so the real question is, is this what I want to make an unnecessary splurge on)? What happens when I DON’T PR and want to shin kick myself (note: this will happen regardless on Nov. 4th, so really we’re just speeding up the inevitable by jumping to a May marathon).

I go back and forth between hitting register and not about 482304 times a day.

This is not unusual for me. I’m like this about every other decision in life as well–big or small. Move to NY? Stay in DC? Rent a movie? Watch TV? Honey Nut Cheerios? Multi Grain Cheerios? Go back to school? Apply for a new job? There must be a name for this illness. Actually, I care far less about the name than I do the cure. Help!!!

If you know of any good doctors, please leave their names and numbers in the comments. If you know if any must-do May marathons, please also leave info in the comments….

Happy Tuesday kids!



1 Response to “Do you think you have pantophobia?”

  1. 1 Jocelyn March 14, 2012 at 12:13 pm

    Sign up for NJ with me!!!! It’s on May 6th! I am driving in the morning, so i can pick you up on the way.

    Also can we run again soon?

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